Folsom 'Debauchery'

I had a fabulous lunch with my really good friend L today... We used to work together before Richmond did away with us... before our convenient liquid lunches ended for good. ...She was in merchandising, and among other things, was responsible for the interior design of our builder's models...But despite all of this, I was intrigued to learn that her talents went well beyond interior design. This happens to be my favorite piece by her:

Untitled #7 ~ Leslie Callan

I don't think this piece even begins to illustrate what she's truly capable of... I think I'm so drawn to this one because I'm drawn to the grey. The grey with the red pop. She does these really beautiful botanical collections and some cityscapes that would blow your mind. Click the picture to find out for yourself. ...At some point I am bound and determined to have an original hanging in my house.

...Anyway, it had been a while since we caught up. A few 'skinny margaritas' in, and we found ourselves down by the American River.

... Rewind a bit, and on the way to her house, I found this gorgeous old building. (Which isn't uncommon in Old Folsom...) The town is historic... And actually known for a lot more than a prison. ...I think we decided this was the Old Powerhouse's Old Farm House (shrug).... Actually, some cowboys walked by and invited me in for a tour because I was standing outside the wrought iron sticking my camera through. I politely declined. (I also declined to use my southern drawl while declining.)
It's cool to look back at these abandon/rusted tools and hardware that were the heart of this town at one point. The functionality alone makes it art. It's a wonder history was my favorite subject in high school... I just found their shape beautiful. In case you were wondering, I told the cowboys so too.

...And after our happy hike toward the water caused me to slip and fall more times than I can count on one hand (and I won the scrapes to prove it), water wading quickly turned to swimming when my happy ass fell in.
I don't take enough advantage of living so close to such beautiful surroundings. And this, boys and girls, is how you spend the last days of summer....

Or at least me. This is how I do.

A Diamond Amongst Coal

I felt like it was time for an uplifting post, because my labels sure have included a lot of 'grumbles' lately.

I haven't been very open about my weight loss goals, but I was pretty happy to discover yesterday morning that I am officially down 10 lbs.

For those that have read prior posts (as you know), and for those that haven't (I don't blame you), I was on Effexor for about 4 months... During that time I put on a whopping 25 lbs. Kind of not exactly a boost to a blushing newlywed's self esteem. In fact just googling the forums, I'm not alone in the rapid weight gain of those that use antidepresants such as this... Seems as though I might have been one of the lucky ones... The vague warning I was given before deciding to start these meds was not enough for me to really weigh the pros and cons, and as a result, my decision was less than ideally informed. Guess hindsight is blah blah blah.

Anyway, while on Effexor, I tried without success to lose weight... And now that I'm off (for about month now), the endless hunger pains and my bear of an appetite have subsided and I can actually manage portions, and not crave the two-for one specials.

...This is a big step for me personally. I certainly have a long way to go, but I wanted to share in the beginning of my triumphs. :)

Another carrot & stick...

I got in touch with a Mike today from a placement agency. A Mike that I emailed a month ago, and then emailed again a few days later. And again two weeks later. Not to mention the voice mails in between, expressing excitement about a residential construction marketing coordinator job posting I had seen... He was one of the many companies I didn't hear back from.

Then last night Matt forwarded the same damn job posting to me. I was thinking how lazy this guy was for not getting this position staffed already!! So I woke up this morning and called up our good friend Mike, and the guy actually answered! ...We had a good chuckle about the email he had archived from a Laura Brown in July. He commented on how nicely my experience lined up with the job I was inquiring about, but that the company would be taking a few more weeks to hire... Mid Septemberish, I think. The salary looks good and it's close to home... Might be worth the wait.

...I'm funny because I act as if I have companies lined up at my door.

"Can't sell your soul for peace of mind..."

...Speaking of square one... Tom Petty is definitely one of my top three all-time favorite artists. This came off his latest release.

I find such peace in this song. Despite it being so much about the struggle.*

*I chose imeem.com because in the beginning, it allowed the entire song to be embeded without a sruggle. Apparently that is no longer the case. My guess is that it's the artist's choice to shut down any "unauthorized distribution" of their music... Which is a shame. Everyone should be able to hear this art. ......In any case, I still encourage you to explore this recording. Overprotected or not.

The poppies simply didn't align...

But I did get to do some "networking" with a VP in the industry, which I haven't done since I was "right-sized". (Hey, I'm looking at the bright side.)

On a serious note, things could have definitely gone worse. I put in my application with the builder a week and a half ago... Fast forward to yesterday, and the Northern California Regional Sales and Marketing VP leaving me a message on my voice mail asking for a call back....

As a result, last night I started my usual interview-prep homework. Printing out any and every article I could find on the company, researching the companies privately and publicly-held data, as well as their current status in the Nor Cal market. And the job description. Yes, a run through of the job description might be good...... But wait. Had I even read this? What is all this clerical/administrative crap? "Will administratively service marketing and sales staff as needed"? "Will answer phone calls from customers and answer questions that fall under scope of knowledge"?.......Flashback to an 18-year old me in a cramped, a/c-less cubicle, licking envelopes for some rehab facility's direct mail campaign... and I start to panic. "Sales and Marketing Coordinator" started to read as "Coordinator to the Sales and Marketing Departments"...

...You probably don't see much of a difference, do you? Um, switch out the word "coordinator" with the word "bitch" and you'll read it as I do.

Yeah, I've found that you can throw the word "marketing" at just about anything and get away with it. I triple-dog-dare you to scroll down one monster "marketing" job search listing page and NOT find a receptionist or administrative assistant position. Because we're all glorified secretaries right? ...Pardon my rant.

To wrap up this god-awfully-forsaken scattered pile of a post, the VP basically called to tell me that my experience didn't fall in line with what they were looking for. In other words, he felt that my talents would be put to waste. In fact, they weren't even sure they'd be hiring from the outside because they weren't sure this position merited the hiring of another full-time person.

And there we have it. Again, it could have been worse. Orange poppies or no orange poppies. I'm back at square one. With a little less faith in "signs".

"...lemonade."

Matt just called. His Jeep's driver's side window just fell into his door. Do you want to know what that falls on the heels of? ......No? Well, I'm going to tell you any way.

My car's been in the shop since last Tuesday. The part the took until this Monday to come in was wrong because apparently an '03 Saab has two sets of different-year parts in them. Only, nobody knows which parts are which year. Charming, no? So we should be getting my car back on Wednesday, only to have the pleasure of turning around and handing Matt's keys to the mechanic. I swear we alone are financing his boat.

But wait! There's more! The kicker here is that my car was in the shop for two weeks not a month and a half ago for "ignition coil" and automatic lock problems.

Sigh.

I won't even get into the damper this has put on any sooner-than-later Nitro plans.

Ode to SatC

71 days and 4 unemployment checks later, and where has jobless-ness got me? Completely and utterly addicted to Sex and the City. No lie.

...On a whim, I started recording it off of some deep cable channel that reruns it at least once a day, and every morning I get to start my day with a gem of an episode from '98 or '00. Forget that I am, again, about a decade behind the times... This show is AWESOME! Especially with my new-found inner-author, I identify so much with Carrie...

Again, let's overlook the fact that the episodes are set to a virtual "shuffle", and that Charlotte has gone from married, to living with some guy, to single and dating, and back again.... The show is SO smart and needless to say, I have been thoroughly entertained. It's become a part of my morning routine and will be quite the habit to rid myself of when it comes time to start pulling my weight around here.

I haven't seen the movie yet..... Guess I'd better get caught up on '01 - '04 first.

P.S. Nothing but love, but doesn't Samantha's dress look like something straight out of '87? Who ok'd that?

'Little Fire'

When I get uber bored, I surf the net for baby names. For the future. The far off and away future. You see, I sort of have this list going.

So I'm browsing the Celtic section when I decided to ask Matt what he thought of the name 'Aidyn' for a girl....

"............it's cool."

I say, "...it means 'Little Fire'."

"Oh. You should be looking up the name that means 'smart and subordinate'."

Cross Your Fingers

OK, so I may have my head in the clouds, but I do have my feet on the ground. ....For the most part.

I have a new job prospect. A pretty serious one, actually. It's with a new homebuilder.... as a marketing coordinator. What do ya know?

You might be asking yourself why I would take a position with another homebuilder when I just got burned by one... Well the truth is, I really love this industry. Also... I've been doing my homework and this company consolidated their Northern California division and based itself out of SACRAMENTO. Strange, no? Everyone and their mother seems to be moving to the Bay Area. So that was music to my ears. Secondly, they have 19 communities in Northern California (10 of them being in the Sacramento Area). My last employer had closer to 7 (and 2 were active in Sac). Seems like this might be a really great opportunity for me.

But don't worry. My hopes are already hopelessly up.

Want to know something strange too? A little too eery to be just coinidence? ...I've been looking for a print for a little color pop above my stove top for a LONG time now. And I finally settled on this gorgeous orange poppies print from art.com by Paula Benson. A day after this print arrived, the co's "people services" department got back to me and said they would for sure be in touch with me next week. Well, needless to say, the poppy print was too big for the space, but as soon as I started research the homebuilder's website - I kid you not - orange poppies popped up as their main graphic on their careers home page. Plain as day. ........Could this maybe be a sign?

Cross your fingers for me.

(art by Paula Benson)

free

"Open up your mind and see like me. Open up your plans and damn you're free. Look into your heart and you will find that the sky is yours."

~ Jason Mraz, I'm Yours

All or Nothing

So I've really been struggling with my child-like tendencies lately. ...In all seriousness. I am fully willing to admit that there are certain selfish and stubborn elements to my personality... Not to mention my penchant for unrealistic expectations. ...Let's face it - I could be the poster child for instant gratification. I need it when I want it which is right this second.

So yeah... I've been struggling with this for some time now. Being that I'm an adult and all.

I've particularly been coming to blows with this conundrum in my personal relationships... For me, it's black and white and nothing in between. In fact, take that analogy and apply it to all aspects of my life.

Por Ejemplo(s):

If I start an exercise "regime" (which never actually materializes into a "regime"), I start with a 5-mile walk... Because if I break a sweat, I may as well break A LOT of it, right?

When I get my heart set on a car... There is no other. Nothing to change my mind. (See a few posts below)...

Guess what else? I want twins. I want twins simply because I want to acquire from of one pregnancy what you would normally acquire from two.

When I paint the walls of my house, the image of a half-painted wall is stressful for me. Stressful. So I will literally stay up until 2am to finish a wall and avoid that image.

...There simply is no gray. At least not if I can help it.

And I know it's a tough sell - but this attitude, when intermingled with personal affairs, is often hazardous...............

This concept certainly isn't an epiphany for me. I've been self aware for some time... And I've also been lucky enough to have people love me despite my all or nothing mentality. ...But it wasn't until recently that I took the time to notice those that will openly admit to their shortcomings, as if it excuses them of ever trying to make a change. And I don't want to become that person.

"Moderation" may be a foreign word to me, but I am making a conscious effort to learn the language.

The Innocuous Shrug

If marriage is only made up of the woman nagging and the man shrugging... Then I've been duped.

I'll Give YOU a Stamp

You know what I'm starting to realize? ...Job hunting is emotionally exhausting. I liken it to...

Going after a prize, and whether or not you win this prize all depends on if some random strangers decide to give you their stamp of approval. So to earn that stamp, you're doing this song and dance for people that you probably wouldn't look two times at on the street because you know they hold your fate in their sweaty little palms.

And you want to know what the worst part is? ...They know it too.

Yawn.

I am about to dive face-first into my eye lids, but I would just like to state for the record that a married life is a good life. And that my husband is my everything.

That is all.

Car Lust

I have loved it since the first time I saw it. (And I think I just might be breaking Matt down!!)

Reader, meet my dream car...... Dodge Nitro R/T, meet Reader.

Imagine. And then never stop.

"You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus."

~ Mark Twain

"...with young people bearing the brunt..."

Again with the waking up in the middle of the night. Maybe the AM hours get my creative juices flowing, because I always end up back here.

So I've been a bit disillusioned lately. This layoff had been a long time coming for me, and going into it, I knew that I'd be taking some time between jobs... But it's only now (when a job just won't fall in my lap already) that I'm starting to really concern myself with the idea that this job hunting thing may not be so short-term.

And I'm told not to be too hard on myself. But even in my 8th job-less week, I still forget to factor in that the unemployment rate just hit to 5.7% and that the job market is saturated.... And just when I'm trying to come to terms with my idealism and its naivety, Matt sent me this uplifting little tid bit:

"The U.S. economy got mostly bad news on Friday as the July unemployment rate jumped to 5.7%, with young people bearing the brunt of the losses. The level was higher than expected by economists, who were looking for 5.6% on average...."

Makes the future look a little bleak, no? (At least Forbes thinks so)...

Since I've last updated you, I haven't heard back from the companies I have resumes with, but I just put in two more resumes this week. Turning in a resume is easy for me - it's the following up and faking enthusiasm stuff that's hard.

...The more the time passes, the more I'm trying to accept that this next job may not be exactly what I'm looking for, and could quite probably become the dreaded 'transitional' position. And I guess what you're reading is my way of setting myself up for a situation that will likely turn out to be something less-than-ideal.

Meet The Ruin

Up until this point, I've only linked them under this site's friends... But I feel they deserve so much more than that. (: So pardon me for a moment while I soak this posting in heaps of praise.

THE RUIN shaking the walls at Java Cafe ~ November 3, 2007.

They came together about 2 years ago... Played their first show about a year ago and now have a discography of around 15 (or more) original songs (plus one AWESOME Sublime cover). .....It technically all started in Ryan's apartment with Matt and Ryan on the guitar and drums, respectively. Then Ryan's roommate Kris came and added some vocals.... And finally Ryan's brother-in-law, Andy, took over drums and moved Ryan to guitar and Matt to bass. Got that?

I really don't know how to describe their music... So I won't. I'll just say that they have loads of talent and I think they sound better than what you're hearing on the radio. But I guess I'm biased, right?


...Go HERE for all things The Ruin. And just to insert my disclaimer: Their current recordings really don't serve their live shows any justice. :) .......Oh, and check the same link for show dates.......And then go and pass on the good word! :)

(photo by me =D)

I Heart 'Law & Order'

I love how TNT runs the credits to one Law & Order episode alongside the intro of another. Whoever thought up that idea deserves a promotion. It reals you right in.... I could lose 5 hours - easy.

Encouraging My Recliner Habit

We FINALLY got Netflix today! I was getting so tired of forgetting to return our movies to Blockbuster, who despite their "no late charges" campaign, have still found some way to tack on addition charges to the $5.99 you're already paying to see one movie one time.

Anyway, I was going through, saving movies I was interested in seeing... I've managed to get 24 movies in my queue already! ...And then a pop up encouraged me to fill out a short survey so they could suggest movies that might fit my taste.

What does it mean when your list's first three suggested movies are dramas made for and about gay men?

Uh, Brokeback Mt. anyone?

Brokeback, A Review

So I just got through Brokeback Mountain. I'm only about 3 years behind the times.... It's been on my list to see for a long time, but Matt had no interest, so I finally decided to rent it and watch it by myself.

Surprisingly enough (to me), I only cried once. (It was when Ennis was leaving Jack's parents' place. You know, with the shirts.) ...What really brought me to tears was deciding it was a good idea to youtube Heath Ledger tributes after the movie. I don't know why it feels like I lost someone personally.

Beyond his talent, he lived his life with poise and grace. And beyond such an amazing story, such vivid cinematography, and such plausible performances - this film left me with this hollow feeling... just in knowing that that talent onscreen is lost forever.

What does your Scrabble board say about you?

Dong?

Newest Obsession

I CAN NOT stop listening to this song...