Among Many Attempts

...to actually get a reach-around picture with myself and the animals. I always end up getting my face slimed with the other one off doing their own thing. Prime example:

Interesting Theory

"Nothing shows a man's character more than what he laughs at."

~Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe


...So is it bad that I laugh hysterically when people fall down?

Color Me "Certified"

That is all.

"Certifiable"

So tomorrow (I think) is the Big Day. The culmination of the last 6 weeks of training. The reason I say "I think" is because this whole culmination thing was supposed to happen on Thursday, but as you can see my managers aren't exactly worried about punctuality.

So I'm getting "Certified". Getting "certified" means that I finally get in to "Production". Getting into "production" means I can finally sit at my desk and make outbound phone calls and try to get people to come into the school so I can talk them into enrolling.

Getting "Certified" consists of spending approximately an hour and a half with my manager posing as a prospective student. Taking him through the 35-slide power point presentation that I have now memorized... The presentation includes a component where I will take about 25 minutes questioning the "applicant" about his education and employment history and his career objectives to ensure I'm placing him in the correct (one of eight) programs... Then, I will take him on a tour of the campus, making sure to hit at least 12 "features", explaining each, you know, as an expert... And finally we commence the presentation, and I "close" the "student" by having him sign on the dotted line...

I went on a mock Interview as these things are called on Thursday. It was my first. And I am horrified to say that it was a disaster. It was the first time that I had the chance to actually piece every thing together.

They say no one ever fails these things. And I'm not so worried about that.

It's the ass-of-myself that I'm bound to make in front of real applicants that turns my stomach.

Pass the Carving Kit

Tonight we're going to a gift exchange. A little late, huh?

Well, we're going to exchange all the gifts we got that we really don't want. It makes for a fun little night.

Last year we got this horrible, 26-year-old fruit carving kit. (As old as me!) ...It obviously wasn't actually a gift my friend had received last Christmas, but she couldn't resist. There was an instruction book. With pictures. Did you know that you can make a trout out of fruit?

Anyway, we never actually used it, and are planning to start a tradition of "pass-the-carving kit". Naturally, I can't post this before we leave... So I'll let you know how it turns out. ~ 4:01pm

We did the whole wrap the gift in the big box to throw the gift receiver off thing. And it worked. I am thoroughly excited to have this out of our possession.

In return, we received some pretty interesting "prizes", as our hostess liked to put it:

Some of the party-goers had just gotten pregnant, and decided to pass on some things that they might not need any longer. ...Just hoping it's not a sign. At least for now... ~ 11:14pm

Simply Amazing

So if you have a few minutes, I thoroughly encourage you to watch this video. When I first saw it, I was blown away... I believe it has the ability to put to rest any belief that animals lack intelligence, and therefore emotion.

Watch it through to the end. I promise you won't regret it.

The Final Product...

So Matt finished the pup's bed (referenced a few posts back), and here's the final result:

They're not spoiled whatsoever.

What I Know

I can't begin to describe the horrific day I had. Mostly because I do not want to. That would require partially reliving it.

But I'm home now with husband, the aroma of pizza-in-the-oven in the air, and a cold beer in hand.

This is the way I know how to put troubles behind me.

I'm Beaming

Say Goodbye Mr. Bush.

Being held up by strings has got to get boring after eight years anyhow...

His Latest Project

So My Little Carpenter is out Home Depoting, getting ready to construct a pretty unique dog bed. We can't go with the regular kind because, although Thelma may have finally learned the difference between what is intended to be a stuffed toy, and what is intended to be a comfortable bed to lay on while we're away, Wynn has yet to differentiate.

So with the left over wood from my shoe rack, two free pallets and a bunch of free carpet off Craigslist... His clever mind came up with nailing down something soft-surfaced onto something raised from the cold concrete. They've been spoiled and have had their humans home for going on 10 months now. Aaaand that's about to change.

I would love to keep them inside while we're away. I would love to trust the little monsters. But my one-year-old bundle of joy has left us too many unearthly surprises in our garage alone. And I am not about to let her perform her tasmanian devil-like acts indoors.

So between the dog door from the garage to backyard, their water jug, a plethora of toys, and now this bed, hopefully Chateau de Brown will be accommodating. At the very least.

Update 1 ~ Pre-padding:

5:15pm... I think they know it's theirs

In This Economy

Our economy has been spiraling for a few years now. I guess 2008 is when people really decided to start taking notice... You know, when their husbands lost their job or when the "adjustable" on their rate took effect.

We hear recession talk from officials. Things about how we haven't seen an economy this bad in twenty years. ...Then there's the analysts out there who make money off people's last threads of hope. Telling stories about how and when the market will recover, basing their facts on the tendencies of past economic movement. Yet, not one of their theories line up.

People's minds are made up and fingers adamantly pointed at what they believe the cause of this decline to be: George or Wall Street or the greed of the mortgage industry. Because their personal decline certainly couldn't be chalked up to their zeroed out credit cards or the shiny new cars sitting in their driveways bought solely on credit. It's not their lack of savings or retirement plans, or (gasp) their own greed.

I can't have a conversation today about anything without the terms "in this economy" sneaking their ugly way in. And maybe it's because I started a new job a month back, and Matt's starting his new job at the end of the month. Maybe it's because all we hear about on the news, you know, in between the violence-driven stories, is about how much less your house is worth that day or how worried we should be about a collapse.

But these words are now cringe-worthy. They've worn out their welcome. I'm tired of all the bitching and complaining in this economy.

Less Mental Effort

"It takes less mental effort to condemn than it does to think."

~ Emma Goldman

(photo courtesy of The Bilerico Project)

Silently Kicking and Screaming

I applied for two jobs this week. On a whim, you could say.

I'm like a child. And applying for new jobs is me throwing my temper tantrums. It's me silently kicking and screaming.

Realistically, I'm casting off resumes into the universe to see if the universe happens to cast anything back. And if I've learned from past experience..... That's not exactly how things work. These days.

The tantrums basically boil down to human decency and respect. Both lacking in my current supervisor and both of which I place great value in. ...Likely a shrugging-off factor for most, but for me?...Quite the predicament.

My guru calls these types of people my "hooks". Meaning they, above all others, have the ability to start me on a 2-hour rant by merely lifting an eyebrow. And I can't disagree with the man. My boss not only gets under my skin, he like lives there.

For example: End of the day on Monday, I was asked to schedule an appointment with the new Dean, who is still covering his old position. So yes, the man is BUSY. I was told that any time would be appropriate. So when I came back with a 9:30am for the next morning, and was then told by Boss that "Oops, we have something scheduled up until that time", my natural reaction was to stand up and walk toward the door to let the new BUSY Dean know that we'd have to change the appointment time. Instead, I was told four times to sit down and to not worry about it. "We'll get around to him."

K. Um. Hypothetical (and wish to F I had the cajones to ask) question to Boss: "Just for curiosity's sake... Is it policy to completely disrespect a person's time around here?"

I mean, the man had an audience in my fellow trainees. I'm sure him having to tell me four times (upon my insistence), only served as fuel for the power voyage he had embarked on already.

Why is it always the ones that aren't worth your time/the effort/a damn, the ones that seem to hit you the hardest?

Or is it just that I have to do what he says?

Just an Observation

Why is it that every time my pharmacy puts me on hold, I'm graced with the wondrous music of Ms. Britney Spears?

A Girl's Dream

Since we moved in over a year ago, I've been dealing with a shoe pile up to my waist... Which resulted in digging for shoes every morning and catching the random stiletto in the heel while searching for said shoes... Not to mention the valuable space it'd take up in our closet and the scuff marks that would magically appear on my brand new, never-worn shoes...

So I started web shopping for shoe racks, none of which seemed to fit my needs... All of which seemed to want an entire paycheck.

And I got to thinking about this period of time about two years back where Matt was buying power tools biweekly for about 3 months straight. ...What better time than now to put them to use? The cost of wood was way cheaper than what these stores wanted for these assemble-yourself crap racks, and hey! Free labor!

......But seriously. My husband built me a shoe rack. ...How amazing is that?

And it's not just some lumber thrown together. It is this beautiful, custom-built piece of art as far as I'm concerned.

....And is now the second thing to bring a smile to my face every morning.

Guess it was worth it...

So I'm not much of a gambler, but last night, upon signing in at my work's holiday party, we were handed two poker chips and encouraged to participate in the festivities.

I guess there was texas, craps, and roulette... But Matt and I stayed glued to the side of blackjack's table all night. The real reason being - I barely know the rules of 21, let alone all the other games made up to confuse me out there. I figured this was our best shot. And there were some pretty nice prizes up there.

What made it really interesting was the card dealers were told to make the games "fun" for the guests. In other words, I didn't see him win one hand. And yes, I must say, it did make it really fun....... In fact he was blatantly telling me to hit or stay. And if one person's card on the table would benefit another's and vice versa, he would switch them. And if it turned out his hand would be a 20 or 21, he would fan out the deck and ask some one to pick another top card just to be sure the table didn't lose.... Yes. I think Vegas should take some lessons.

So, courtesy of our generous dealer, after starting the night out with $10,000 combined, Matt and I ended with $37,500 and walked away with a $200 gift card to Best Buy. I think we placed 3rd. Not too shabby, eh?

It was either that or two bills at Massage Envy. But Matt's been talking about this blue ray thing FOREVER. And I love him and stuff.

She's a People

Matt told me the other day that when we're gone, Wynn spends her time pacing incessantly in the courtyard... While the older and wiser parks herself comfortably in the people chair, patiently waiting for our return.

Today, I just so happen to catch her in the act...

Thelma sunbathing

"That Girl"

Tonight's my work's ("pc") holiday party. I have an interesting variety of personalities at work, so at the very least, it should be good for entertainment.

Lately, I'm guessing due to my leg meds, alcohol seems to be taking to my head rather quickly. So I've asked Matt to monitor my intake. The last thing I need 5 weeks into my position is to be that girl.

So I've got my dress all pressed and my nails all polished and my smile all plastered...

This better be good.

"I Want to Recruit You"

This weekend Matt and I saw the movie MILK, starring Sean Penn as Harvey Milk. We generally find movies about actual events interesting, and this being about the first openly gay politician to be elected to public office seemed intriguing.

I was blown away. In many respects, actually.

To start, Sean Penn's performance was phenomenal. If I've ever seen an actor melt into a character, it was on this screen. Mr. Penn became Mr. Milk. It took me reminding myself that this was Penn... Penn...

Secondly, the story, which I have never heard before, was all-inspiring.

After unsuccessfully running for political office for three consecutive years, Harvey finally landed a seat in the San Francisco Board of Supervisors. He went from the prominent figure for hundreds to tens of thousands of members of the gay community. And after campaigns across the country were being fought to stifle the rights of those who chose this alternate lifestyle, Harvey willingly invited the fight for their civil liberties to be brought to California.

Harvey Milk staking out campaign headquarters

The culmination came in 1978, when conservatives submitted Proposition 6, otherwise known as the Briggs Initiative, suggesting that all homosexual teachers, and anyone associated with them should be eradicated from all school districts in California. The argument was that gay teachers would teach children to be gay. ("Sort of like French?" Harvey would dead-pan in a debate with the proposition's leader, John Briggs). In these debates Briggs would compare homosexuals to pedophiles. The ultimate conservative argument was the "protection of the children".

Sound familiar?

It was difficult to walk out of the theater, 30 years later, knowing that these people were still in the battle of their lives. And that the "protection of marriage" was still winning.

I don't know what anyone's political or religious beliefs are. But mine can be summed up simply: LIVE AND LET LIVE. ...These people should have the same rights we are entitled to, regardless of sexual orientation. In 20 years, this is going to be looked at as the same type of civil liberty struggles African Americans and women went through. But perhaps less forgivable considering how "advanced" we consider ourselves to be.

...So yeah, MILK. If you don't know the ending, I don't want to ruin it. And if you don't plan to see the movie... I encourage you to at least look into the story.

Also, have you heard of the "Twinkie Defense"? Totally related.

This story is extraordinarily beautiful, if you can look past the hatred.

Sink or Swim

I guess tonight work was holding a "phone-a-thon", which we didn't have to worry about because we're still in training. Yes, that was until we were handed a list of phone numbers and told we'd be dialing out.

...I used to work in a call center selling Cortislim, this "fat-burner" that the manufacturers were later sued over for misrepresentation and fraud. The job was cake. ...But the difference between that job, and this one, is that now I'm making the calls. At least when I was hawking Cortislim, I had all the suckers calling me.

I didn't realize how difficult it would really be until they handed me a script. ...I sat and stared at the dial pad for 10 minutes before making any actual progress.

It's "sink or swim" as they say. But I'd say the first few calls were more of a "flailing".

A Lesson in 'Perceived Obstacles'

So I learned something in training at work today. ...Don't act so surprised. ;)

I came across a concept that struck home because it's specific to struggles I've been internalizing for some time now.

...Is it me, or can anyone else take a look at another person's life and formulate unclouded, crystal clear answers (/suggestions) for their problems? ...Yet, when it comes to your own life and problems, the lights flick off and you find yourself bumping into walls? ...Walls you surely you built on your own?

"A perceived obstacle is an obstacle you create because of your own values. It may or may not be real." ...I extracted this from some sales training module, so I'm not even sure it's worthy of a citing. But I have endured a hell of a lot of obstacles, People. And it got me thinking..... Just how many of them are and were self-induced?

The module went on to encourage its reader not to reveal their perceptions until these perceptions were somehow confirmed. ...Though this is likely an age-old sales trade secret, it was news to me. And though it seems, in hindsight, to be such a common-sensical notion, why am I still bumping into walls?

And as if creating my own obstacles and knowing it isn't bad enough, I seem to have this innate need to verbalize "my truth" to just about anyone who will listen. ...I do not discriminate. This approach seems to backfire every time, but it's almost a compulsion to put my perception on display. To lay my cards on the table, despite the fact that these cards read every misconception or preconceived notion my little head can dream up.

Is this the mid-twenties knowledge gain that I keep hearing so much about? The forced, life-altering considerations that the older and wiser refer to when they say they wouldn't relive their twenties if you gave them bundles of money?

If I can take anything away from this seemingly ordinary quote, hopefully it will be the ability to step back and differentiate the genuine obstacle from the one floating in my head alone. And, if at all possible, how to keep a damn card in my hand.

Snow Day!

We made a trip up the mountain today to treat the snouts to their first snow experience. It's been dumping up there for a while, so we didn't have to go far... We pulled off at Blue Canyon and were lucky enough to find a uninhabited clearing.

Wynn was a little apprehensive about the stuff at first, but her and Thel were running in circles in no time.

Blue Canyon

On watch

See Wynn fetch

Circle #63

Me frolicking with my pups

Circle #78

He so missed

A Borrowed Resolution

"To be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind...

To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true...

To think only of the best, to work only for the best and to expect only the best...

To forget the mistakes of the past and to press on to the greater achievements of the future...

To give so much time to improving yourself that you have no time to criticize others...

To live in the faith that the whole world is on your side, so long as you are true to the best that is in you."

~ Christian D. Larson, Promise Yourself

Happy '09

...I really expected for 2008 to be an easier year than '07. I'm not sure what gave me the notion that if you have one hard year, it will of course be followed with an easier one. What's funny is that I expect the same of '09. Something easier.

You'd think I'd learn.